Cupid never misses the mark when hes hooking other people up, but some of his own pick-up lines? Well, you be the judge Whats your sign, honey? Mines the Archer, and I always hit the target, if you know what I mean Baby, once you go Cupid, the rest are just stupid. Whoa, is that an arrow in my diaper or am I just happy to see you? My Cloud 9 or yours? My name is Cupid, but you can call me the God of Love because I am, the God of Love. Really, it says so right here on my drivers license. Do you believe in love at first sight or should I do another flyby? Wanna go back to my well, crib? No, not working for ya? Well, baby, this will! Its Valentines Day - watch your back, Sweetie!
Enter your name below: SENDER'S NAME Happy April Fools' Day! Exit. System Error. That's it?! OK. These emails don't just spontaneously burst into existence, you know. Programmers actually have to spend time coding these suckers. OK. I mean, really! Will a few more minutes of art appreciation hurt you? Think of the poor sap who sat at a desk, coloring this thing in. OK. And don't be too quick to forget about the nice person who sent you this email. Do you think they give these things away for free? No way - somebody shelled out big bucks for this baby. OK. Are You Sure? Are you positively SURE you want to exit this program? OK. Ok, then... Well, OK, then... OK. You're a Persistent One, Aren't You? If you really want to exit this program, I won't stop you. OK. Last One, I Promise! ...except to wish you a happy April Fools' Day one last time. OK. Honestly, This Is the Last One. Happy April Fools' Day! OK. Gullible. Boy, you'll believe anything you read, won't you? OK. Or is the button-pushing thing some kind of compulsion? OK. Hey, I don't have all day, you know! Do you want to exit this program or not?! OK. Then why didn't you say so in the first place?! OK. In honor of April Fools' Day, this complete waste of time has been brought to you by SENDER'S NAME .
I'm pump pump pumped for Pumpkin day! I'll tell you somethin' The night is bumpin' the party's thumpin' and I am pumped, Yo 'cause I'm a pump-kin I feel the beat now let's trick or treat now I got some candy handy take it to the street now! I'm pump pump pumped for Pumpkin day! Oh Yeah, trick or treat. Yo! Happy Halloween!
Who is that pattering on the rooftop eight days in December (excluding the Sabbath)? Who is it that braves the freezing temperatures (without so much as a sweater) to deliver presents under the menorah? Who is it that noshes on your milk and rugelach in the wee hours of the night? Is it Santa? Is it a burglar? NO! It's Zayde Claus! This is why we don't have holiday characters. Happy Hanukkah!
All too often through the year, our warm thoughts of the special things in our lives go unspoken, even though the feelings are always in our hearts . . . that's why Diwali is the perfect chance to remind you how much you mean, how special you are and how warmly you're wished every happiness. Have a happy and prosperous Diwali!
Beautiful memories, Joyful gatherings, Lasting love... Receiver(s), Hoping your Thanksgiving is a beautiful reminder of all the wonderful things in your life. Every Happiness to You on Thanksgiving and Always.
I thought I'd seen the last of you, And you want to see the end of me, Well Honey, this turkey won't be deceased for your Thanksgiving feast (just listen to me now!) I'm gonna make it! I know I can! I'm gonna live to see December, put away your roasting pan, I'm gonna miss out on being dished out, Hope mashed potatoes fill you up Cuz this turkey won't be stuffed You can have your yams and cranberries Have some pumpkin pie, but you can't have me! When the cookin' starts on that cold Thursday, This bold bird will be M.I.A. The main course has flown the coop. Drumsticks don't fail me now! I'm gonna make it! I know I can! I'm gonna live to see December, put down that roasting pan, Yes I'm a winner, not your family dinner Hope the dressing is enough Cuz this turkey won't be stuffed (Get a cow if ya wanna chow!) (you want some protein? serve some beans!)
Getting old Getting old Getting old today Count the years Face the truth Whats your body say? Stretch you back Crack your neck How you feel today? Getting old Getting old today Seen my keys? Ow, my knees! Whys the print so small? Hard to see Have to pee And that isnt all First Im hot Then Im cold Now I cant recall What I said Oh, the hell with it all Make a wish! Blow out the candles on your cake and dont leave anything to chance Cross your legs! Cause when youre laughing you dont want to accidently wet your pants. Forget about Calories and carbohydrates -- all the stuff that makes you fat Eat some cake The only clothing you will fit in later will just be your hat. Have a good Have a good Have a good Birthday That is all That is all That I have to say Ill repeat One more time Therefore, if I may Have a good Have a good Birthday!
One evening on the bunny trail with cotton tails a-hoppin' I saw a ragged bunny, his big ears were a-floppin' But he smiled a big old smile although he coulda blown a gasket He said I'm happy 'cause I got to see the Easter Candy Basket. In the Easter Candy Basket, there's lots of jelly beans They're yellow, red, and purple, white, and orange and green, Some of them weigh twenty pounds, some are big as bricks, But you'll eat a lot, no matter what, Prepare to increase the size of your butt From the Easter Candy Basket. In the Easter Candy Basket, you'll see marshmallow chicks You chew their little heads off, and you'll need lots of toothpicks. The eggs are solid chocolate, their shells are made of gold. Oh the bunnies and the hens are chocolate friends They're neatly all contained in cellophane, (cont.) You'll eat them without thinking of the weigh you'll gain. You feel nauseated, but you can't abstain, Better get ready for abdominal pain From the Easter Candy Basket.
Hey-ho, happy birthday, Hey-ho, happy birthday . . . Today is your birthday, Time for a soiree, Hip, hip hooray, Its a birthday rock! Another year older, A little less bolder, Toesre feelin colder, Its a birthday rock! For breakfast now its Bran Flakes, Loud and sudden wind breaks, Oh, Lordy, I get back aches, Its a birthday rock! On my plate is puree, On my head a toupee, Most evenings we do crochet, Its a birthday rock! Hey-ho, happy birthday, Hey-ho, happy birthday . . .
St. Patrick's Day Prayer God, our Father, you sent St. Patrick to preach your glory to the people of Ireland. By the help of his prayers, may all Christians proclaim your love to all men. Grant this through our Lord Jesus Christ, your Son, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. This prayer is for your happiness with blessings from above To fill your days in special ways with lots of joy and love. God Bless You on St. Patrick's Day and Always!
An Interfaith Passover Blessing featuring 7 religious leaders from diverse walks of life discussing how Passover is important for people of all faiths! Pass it on to **Everyone** regardless of their religious background and celebrate coming together like never before! Happy Passover
And now, in honor of Halloween, the Top 5 Scarecrow Complaints! Number 5 Every day its denim and flannel, denim and flannel. Number 4 Two words: Crow poop. Yeah, youre real brave when youre up there, huh? Come down here and well see how tough you are! Number 3 Everybody just assumes that you can dance like that Wizard of Oz scarecrow. And by the way, a brain aint the first organ ID be wishing for, you know what Im sayin? Number 2 This job would be a lot easier if I was packin heat. And the Number 1 Scarecrow Complaint... Youd be grumpy too if you had a broomstick up your a$$. Happy Halloween