Easter Sunday! Eat your candy! Hallelujah! Eat your candy! Hallelujah! Choc'late bunnies! Choc'late bunnies! In the basket! They're fantastic! The grass is plastic! Eat every jelly bean -- The yellow, pink and green! Hallelujah! Eat your candy! Hallelujah! Eat your candy! Hallelujah! Hope your Easter begins and ends on a happy note!
There's the kinda strong Like a country song When the lead guitar's on fire. There's the kind like a fighter Or a rodeo rider There's the kind like a steel-belt tire. There sure are lots of different Kinds-a strong -- that's surely true, But none compare, any time anywhere To a DAD STRONG dude like you! Chorus: DAD STRONG! Dad strong! ...and it fills our hearts with gratitude. DAD STRONG! Can't be wrong! ...with a thousand watts of DAD-i-tude. DAD STRONG! Can I get an oh yeah? Happy Father's Day!
KETCHUP: Ahhh...now this is the life. MUSTARD: You said it, Ketchup...Nothin' like a picnic on the Fourth of July! KETCHUP: Yep, it's my day to shine! MUSTARD: Wait...Your day? You mean my day... KETCHUP: Get outta here. Everybody knows today's a day to celebrate all things American--Baseball, apple pie, and most importantly HOTDOGS! And what's better on a hot dog than me? Good ol' Ketchup! Woo-Hoo! I rock! MUSTARD: Have you lost your mind? I go perfect on a hot dog,not you! I mean, don't get me wrong, you're good on say, french fries--- KETCHUP: FRENCH fries?!? Did you just call me French?!? MUSTARD: Lighten up, K. All I'm saying is, I'm better on hot dogs, not you... KETCHUP: Noooo...I'm better. MUSTARD: I'm better. KETCHUP: No me. MUSTARD: Me! KETCHUP: ME! MUSTARD: ME!! KETCHUP & MUSTARD: MEEEEEE!! MUSTARD: Look, let's just say we're both good on hotdogs. After all, America's the great melting pot, right? The land of the free! Home of the brave! The beacon of light for generations of peoples to come together as one... KETCHUP: Plus we're not mayonnaise. KETCHUP and MUSTARD: Bwa-ha-ha-ha-haa! Mayonnaise! What a joke! Nobody likes you! The worst! Etc. Hope your 4th of July can't be topped!
A Dad is An Amazing Man... When he sits in a recliner, IT gets relaxed. He wouldn't mind showing his feminine side...if he had one. No shirt, no shoes---he always gets service. He once asked for directions...just kidding. Google once asked him to find something. He doesn't cut the grass. The grass bows to him. Happy Father's Day to an Amazing Man!
10. O Holiday Tree 9. Have Yourself a Merry Little Day of Winter 8. Frosty the Snowperson 7. Chestnuts Roasting on a Safely Contained, Continuously Monitored, Eco-friendly, Non-toxic Outdoor Fire (for Which I Do Have a Permit) 6. Higher Power Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen 5. Grandma Allegedly Got Run Over By an Unidentified Non-Human Perpetrator 4. Deck the Halls with Boughs of Unendangered Foliage (If Office Policy Permits) 3. Hark! The Herald Mythical Winged Creature Sings 2. I Saw Mommy Greeting Santa Claus with a Purely Platonic Expression of Inoffensive Mutual Affection 1. Ill Be Home for a Short Period of Time in December Hope your holiday rocks.
Hey, I know how much you like getting the latest tech stuff, so for Father's Day I searched all over the web and got you something really special! This electronic greeting! (it's the most advanced model they had) Hope you like it! Happy Father's Day
OK...Scary. Alright - 1, 2, 3, Go! I'm a scary bat, eek, eek eek, give me some candy or I'll bite some holes in you. Are you scared? No? OK. I am death at your doorstep. I'll get you my pretty. I am 100 years old - that's 700 in dog years. You were playing with the Ouija board and now you must pay! I am not a dog with a sheet, I am an evil ghost. Am I scaring you yet? How 'bout now? I saw you flinch! Boo! Eek! Rawr! Oh man. Mom, you're not making my costumes any more, I can't scare anybody. Wishing you a little fright on Halloween night!
Cant wait for the date its nearly here. Love the mood, love the food at this time of year Need a plan for the clan when they gather near. Soon well dine on Thanksgiving Day! Time to shop, time to chop, time to stuff a bird. Roast and baste, salt to taste, check the temperature. Make the sides, bake the pies, keep the gravy stirred. Soon well dine on Thanksgiving Day. Turkeys done, got to run clean the mess and greet the guests, when they come to the door. Time to eat, find a seat, make a toast to our fine host (and check the football score!) Say the grace, keep the pace time to carve so we dont starve Do you want dark or light? Pass the peas and cranberries Got our eyes on the pies May we please take a bite? Were thankful for all that weve been given yes were thankful that if we overeat well be forgiven Cause thanks-giv-ing comes but once a year to celebrate with those so dear and we must state: That as our waistline expands, were grateful for our stretchy pants. Oh, snap! Were hoping that with all the bloat we dont look like a Macys float! Now its time for a nap. Tooooo-morrow when our coma lifts Its to the mall for Christmas gifts This holiday was off the hook, well worth the time and work it took! and look be sure you dont forget to kiss the cook! tag: However you spend it, hope your Thanksgiving is happy!
Who gets up each day, just to earn his pay? Who's fearless and dependable and true? Who's the MVP of his family? Dad is, that's who! If you need advice With some tech device, he's up to every task. If you're stuck, or you Need a buck or two? You only have to ask. Who should just unwind, have a rest, recline? Take a break from all he does the whole year through? Yes -- who's number one for the things he's done? Dad is, that's who Dad is -- that's YOU!! Relax -- you've earned it! Happy Father's Day
How the Easter Bunny Got His Job Easter Egg Delivery Specialist Tryouts Guy in Red Suit Next Please Dude in Diaper Thats not right. Short Green Guy Uh, thanks, well let you know. Ridiculously Large Bunny Perfect! When can you start? Just Wanted to Deliver an Easter Wish: Have a Good One!
I've got it for you baaaad and that's wooley, wooley good! You make my heart bleat faster if my meaning's understood... Don't be shy or sheepish 'cause if you haven't guessed I love when you're ram-bunctious, 'cause you're the very beeessst! It's time to flock together for some lovin' and sheep thrills... I'd like to fleece ewe, Baby-- And your every wish fulfill! Happy Valentine's Day
It's Thanksgiving! What are you thankful for? I'm thankful for the extra naptime! I'm thankful for the extra leftovers! I'm thankful for this great disguise! I'm thankful for wonderful people like you! Wishing you a very Happy Thanksgiving!
Moms are loving, Ever-caring, Really understanding, too. There with love when things go either Really good or bad for you. Even when you wouldn't wash up, Clean your room, or just say "please," Mom was there with love and guidance During trying times like these. Moms will always clap the loudest, When you've given it your all, Even when you were quite little, Mom made you feel 10-feet tall. So we honor Mom and thank her Each year on this week in May, And wish her with all our hearts A truly classic Mother's Day! Enjoy Your Day!
Mother -- Chef -- Chauffer -- Employee -- Nurse -- Coach -- Cheerleader -- Tutor -- Maid -- Secretary -- Friend -- Happy Mother's Day to a woman who wears a lot of hats. --...which explains why you need so many shoes!
Ill pick my socks up, Moms not my maid, I should ignore the things my weird friends do. So many nights wide awake she laid, Would I come home with piercings or tattoos? The years are passing, they go so fast, Im glad Mom emphasized the Golden Rule. But I was worried and glad she passed On that threat of military school. (The years are passing, they go so fast,) (Im glad Mom emphasized the Golden Rule.) (But I was worried and glad she passed) Wheres mom? (On that threat of military school.) We know a mothers work is never done, Shes always helping, right from the start When theres a problem, shes always calm, Theres nothing tender as a mothers heart. (But when theres trouble or we feel distress,) Be calm (Theres one thing that we all know for sure) Heres mom! (Well need our mothers to clean up the mess.) Theres one thing that we all know for sure Nothings tender as a mothers heart! Wishing you a relaxing, trouble-free Mothers Day. Click here for a special message (OPTIONAL)
Well it's gettin' kinda chilly It's the sled-ridin' time of year Time to wish you (occasion) Filled with joyfulness and cheer (sender's name) wants you to know the good times are here This toboggan is a-rockin' Look out everyone below! Straight from (sender's location) Here's a wild, joyride "Hello!" Frosty fun on the run just a-tearin' through the winter snow This toboggan is a-rockin', through the snow! This toboggan is a-rockin', Go! Go! Go! Another year over; another begun (event from past year) It sure was fun! This toboggan is a-rockin', yeah, Hope you're doing awesome! Let's go! Have a Rockin' Day!
The 12 Dogs of Christmas -- Drummers drumming, Pipers piping, Lords a-leaping, Ladies dancing, Maids a-milking, Swans a-swimming, Geese a-laying, Golden rings, Calling birds, French hens, Turtle doves, Partridge in a pear tree Merry Christmas
From the land they call Erin, Here's a wish that I'm sharin' -- A toast to us all on this day of good cheer: May the road rise up to ya, And the wind not blow through ya, With your glass overflowing with green-colored beer! With green colored beer, With green colored beer, A toast to us all on this day of good cheer! Cheers to a Happy St. Patrick's Day
Thanks for being organized when others fail to be. Thanks for your leadership and strong integrity. Thanks for all the things you do with never a complaint. Thanks for being cool and calm and showing such restraint. Thanks for your support and all the wisdom that you share. But, mostly, thank you very much for always being there! You deserve to have an awesome Boss's Day.
Once upon a time, in a land far away, there was a handsome man who appreciated women for their minds. A man who preferred brains and a sense of humor over a roll in the hay, a man in search of commitment... Thought you might enjoy a good fairy tale on Valentine's Day!