Hey, I know how much you like getting the latest tech stuff, so for Father's Day I searched all over the web and got you something really special! This electronic greeting! (it's the most advanced model they had) Hope you like it! Happy Father's Day
As a boss, our fearless leader Couldn't make our work life sweeter Meeting deadlines, bandwidth crunches, Working oftentimes through dinnertimes and lunches. Texts and emails keep on pinging And your cellphones always ringing. Headaches stack up by the crate-full. It's for all of this and more that I'm so grateful! Happy Boss's Day
10. O Holiday Tree 9. Have Yourself a Merry Little Day of Winter 8. Frosty the Snowperson 7. Chestnuts Roasting on a Safely Contained, Continuously Monitored, Eco-friendly, Non-toxic Outdoor Fire (for Which I Do Have a Permit) 6. Higher Power Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen 5. Grandma Allegedly Got Run Over By an Unidentified Non-Human Perpetrator 4. Deck the Halls with Boughs of Unendangered Foliage (If Office Policy Permits) 3. Hark! The Herald Mythical Winged Creature Sings 2. I Saw Mommy Greeting Santa Claus with a Purely Platonic Expression of Inoffensive Mutual Affection 1. Ill Be Home for a Short Period of Time in December Hope your holiday rocks.
A Dad is An Amazing Man... When he sits in a recliner, IT gets relaxed. He wouldn't mind showing his feminine side...if he had one. No shirt, no shoes---he always gets service. He once asked for directions...just kidding. Google once asked him to find something. He doesn't cut the grass. The grass bows to him. Happy Father's Day to an Amazing Man!
Moms are loving, Ever-caring, Really understanding, too. There with love when things go either Really good or bad for you. Even when you wouldn't wash up, Clean your room, or just say "please," Mom was there with love and guidance During trying times like these. Moms will always clap the loudest, When you've given it your all, Even when you were quite little, Mom made you feel 10-feet tall. So we honor Mom and thank her Each year on this week in May, And wish her with all our hearts A truly classic Mother's Day! Enjoy Your Day!
Mother -- Chef -- Chauffer -- Employee -- Nurse -- Coach -- Cheerleader -- Tutor -- Maid -- Secretary -- Friend -- Happy Mother's Day to a woman who wears a lot of hats. --...which explains why you need so many shoes!
How the Easter Bunny Got His Job Easter Egg Delivery Specialist Tryouts Guy in Red Suit Next Please Dude in Diaper Thats not right. Short Green Guy Uh, thanks, well let you know. Ridiculously Large Bunny Perfect! When can you start? Just Wanted to Deliver an Easter Wish: Have a Good One!
Ill pick my socks up, Moms not my maid, I should ignore the things my weird friends do. So many nights wide awake she laid, Would I come home with piercings or tattoos? The years are passing, they go so fast, Im glad Mom emphasized the Golden Rule. But I was worried and glad she passed On that threat of military school. (The years are passing, they go so fast,) (Im glad Mom emphasized the Golden Rule.) (But I was worried and glad she passed) Wheres mom? (On that threat of military school.) We know a mothers work is never done, Shes always helping, right from the start When theres a problem, shes always calm, Theres nothing tender as a mothers heart. (But when theres trouble or we feel distress,) Be calm (Theres one thing that we all know for sure) Heres mom! (Well need our mothers to clean up the mess.) Theres one thing that we all know for sure Nothings tender as a mothers heart! Wishing you a relaxing, trouble-free Mothers Day. Click here for a special message (OPTIONAL)
Cant wait for the date its nearly here. Love the mood, love the food at this time of year Need a plan for the clan when they gather near. Soon well dine on Thanksgiving Day! Time to shop, time to chop, time to stuff a bird. Roast and baste, salt to taste, check the temperature. Make the sides, bake the pies, keep the gravy stirred. Soon well dine on Thanksgiving Day. Turkeys done, got to run clean the mess and greet the guests, when they come to the door. Time to eat, find a seat, make a toast to our fine host (and check the football score!) Say the grace, keep the pace time to carve so we dont starve Do you want dark or light? Pass the peas and cranberries Got our eyes on the pies May we please take a bite? Were thankful for all that weve been given yes were thankful that if we overeat well be forgiven Cause thanks-giv-ing comes but once a year to celebrate with those so dear and we must state: That as our waistline expands, were grateful for our stretchy pants. Oh, snap! Were hoping that with all the bloat we dont look like a Macys float! Now its time for a nap. Tooooo-morrow when our coma lifts Its to the mall for Christmas gifts This holiday was off the hook, well worth the time and work it took! and look be sure you dont forget to kiss the cook! tag: However you spend it, hope your Thanksgiving is happy!
Aint got no room for haters Cuz Im spreadin the love As Im rainin down my arrows From the heavens above When I send one in the air, its like an angel chorus sings Cuz I got ice on my nappies & bling on my wings. See, Im Q to the P to the I to tha D My aim is true, and yall agree Yeah, Q to the P to the I to tha D Its Valentines Day, yall, thanks to me. Yea, February One-Four is my day to shine Seen around the world on lotsa Valentines Blessin all yer candy hearts with my Heavenly flows, & Lyrics silky-smoother than a thorn-less rose. Do my fly-bys, then sip up on some pink champagne, In My Crib on Cloud Nine Just off of Lovers Ln. See, Im Q to the P to the I to tha D My aim is true, and yall agree Yeah, Q to the P to the I to tha D & Thats My Valentines Rapping Spree. Happy Valentine's Day, Yo!
Who gets up each day, just to earn his pay? Who's fearless and dependable and true? Who's the MVP of his family? Dad is, that's who! If you need advice With some tech device, he's up to every task. If you're stuck, or you Need a buck or two? You only have to ask. Who should just unwind, have a rest, recline? Take a break from all he does the whole year through? Yes -- who's number one for the things he's done? Dad is, that's who Dad is -- that's YOU!! Relax -- you've earned it! Happy Father's Day
OK...Scary. Alright - 1, 2, 3, Go! I'm a scary bat, eek, eek eek, give me some candy or I'll bite some holes in you. Are you scared? No? OK. I am death at your doorstep. I'll get you my pretty. I am 100 years old - that's 700 in dog years. You were playing with the Ouija board and now you must pay! I am not a dog with a sheet, I am an evil ghost. Am I scaring you yet? How 'bout now? I saw you flinch! Boo! Eek! Rawr! Oh man. Mom, you're not making my costumes any more, I can't scare anybody. Wishing you a little fright on Halloween night!
Thanks for being organized when others fail to be. Thanks for your leadership and strong integrity. Thanks for all the things you do with never a complaint. Thanks for being cool and calm and showing such restraint. Thanks for your support and all the wisdom that you share. But, mostly, thank you very much for always being there! You deserve to have an awesome Boss's Day.
From the land they call Erin, Here's a wish that I'm sharin' -- A toast to us all on this day of good cheer: May the road rise up to ya, And the wind not blow through ya, With your glass overflowing with green-colored beer! With green colored beer, With green colored beer, A toast to us all on this day of good cheer! Cheers to a Happy St. Patrick's Day
It's Thanksgiving! What are you thankful for? I'm thankful for the extra naptime! I'm thankful for the extra leftovers! I'm thankful for this great disguise! I'm thankful for wonderful people like you! Wishing you a very Happy Thanksgiving!
These kids, they'll drive you straight into the nuthouse... and by the way, they shaved the dog. These kids, they think the world revolves around them... and by the way, the sink is clogged. And then, the principal would like to see you, What this concerns, you have no clue. And then, some person called who needed someone To volunteer... and now that's you. Mothers! Mothers! You have to do it all! Mothers! Mothers! You're there each time they fall.You're out of milk, you need a hug, The cat threw up on your new rug... |If only they all knew about the stuff that you go through.Mothers! Mothers! You cook, you clean, you work Mothers! Mothers! Trying not to go berserk! Kids need a ride, they want tattoos, They want two-hundred-dollar shoes! On Mother's Day, we thank you for the great things that you do.Hey! On Mother's Day we thank you for the great things that you do !Happy Mother's Day!
Americans! Listen up! I want YOU to have a Happy Fourth of July. That's a request directly from your Uncle Sam. Go out and romp and frolic. Or if you're too tired, you can simply cavort. Or repose yourself upon the reclining object of your choosing. And don't forget to fire up that grill. Throw a horseshoe. Have a barbeque. Throw a horseshoe at the barbeque. I don't care. Just have fun. Indulge in your cold beverage of preference. And, by all means, enjoy some fireworks. Yes, Americans, I want YOU to celebrate Independence Day. Because without Independence Day, we'd all be drinking tea and eating crumpets and fish and chips like a bunch of Queen-lovin' pudding-slurpers! That's right. You heard me. Now get out there and have a Happy Fourth of July!
Youre a mommy, youre a mother, Its a job thats like no other: Its demanding, and its draining, Its a job for which there really was no training. Wiping counters, butts and noses, Cleaning up while famly dozes. Making sure kids wear clean undies, Working all week long, plus Saturdays and Sund-ies. Kissing boo boos, multi-tasking, Know your kids hurt without asking. Gasoline goes by the tank-full, Its for all of this and more your familys thankful! Happy Mothers Day!
Passover's coming, Everyone's running, Preparing something for the Seder meal! Matzo-balls are stewing Chicken-soup is brewing, Everything we're doing With a special zeal! Quick, set the Seder plate, Hurry, it's getting late, Shank bone... roasted egg... Where's the bitter herb!? Cover the matzos up, Fill up Elijah's cup, Chop some potatoes up, Those will be superb! Oh! No! One hour to go! Make charoset and some moror! Sweep the kitchen! Wash the floor-or! Cut horseradish if you're able! Put Haggadahs on the table! Pour the wine! Pour the wine! Collapse... and... have... a... great... night! Happy Passover!