Americans! Listen up! I want YOU to have a Happy Fourth of July. That's a request directly from your Uncle Sam. Go out and romp and frolic. Or if you're too tired, you can simply cavort. Or repose yourself upon the reclining object of your choosing. And don't forget to fire up that grill. Throw a horseshoe. Have a barbeque. Throw a horseshoe at the barbeque. I don't care. Just have fun. Indulge in your cold beverage of preference. And, by all means, enjoy some fireworks. Yes, Americans, I want YOU to celebrate Independence Day. Because without Independence Day, we'd all be drinking tea and eating crumpets and fish and chips like a bunch of Queen-lovin' pudding-slurpers! That's right. You heard me. Now get out there and have a Happy Fourth of July!
Oh (name) you know I love you so much! C'mon Baby, put on your (favorite clothes) looking so fine. I want to eat you up like a (favorite dessert) you drive me out of my mind! Baby, don't you know I think you're so divine! I want to take you out and go (favorite activity) till the end of time! (name) I love you! Ooooohhhh Yeeeaaah
Dad, Dad, Whatta Dad, Happy Fathers Day! Defnitely, Defnitely, Defnitely, Defnitely Take a break today! Stop the music! Youre singing at the same time I am. No, Im not. Yes, you are. Okay, Okay. Calm down. Lets just try again. There you go, again. What? Youre singing my part. Youre just jealous because Im a better singer. You are not! Am so! Are not! Am so! I give up. Hey! Happy Fathers Day!
What are you doing for Valentines Day? Some wear bright red outfits that are really hard to miss. Some prepare to pucker their lips as they try to steal a kiss. Some give special homemade gifts to people that they really adore. Some buy lots of chocolate from the chocolate candy store. Some go out for dinner, yeah to a place that's really chic. Some will spend a quiet evening dancing cheek to cheek. Some barely even celebrate. Some go all out, its true But have yourself a special day No matter what you do! Happy Valentines Day
I'm pump pump pumped for Pumpkin day! I'll tell you somethin' The night is bumpin' the party's thumpin' and I am pumped, Yo 'cause I'm a pump-kin I feel the beat now let's trick or treat now I got some candy handy take it to the street now! I'm pump pump pumped for Pumpkin day! Oh Yeah, trick or treat. Yo! Happy Halloween!
Greetings, greetings its our big day, Pink hearts filled with tasty treats. Were frosted and sprinkled in colorful jimmies, Now thats what we call good eats! We dare you resist us, Well parade around, in our finest foils and lace. Truffles and caramels and soft, gooey centers, Oooh, well melt all over your face. So, enjoy us enjoy us, Theres nothing better than a box of delicious sweets. Especially today Happy Valentines Day, Dont fret about your expanding, ahem, seat.
Ready, OK! Here's a song for a Dad named (recipient) Give that man a trophy He's a Dad who know his stuff He really rocks (personal characteristic) He's a man who's really tough. He's a Dad who (favorite activity) Stand proud! Stand tall! He's a Dad who loves (favorite food) He's the greatest Dad of all! Gooooo Dad! Happy Dad's Day!
Easter Bunnies, we are Easter Bunnies Easter bunnies, that is what we are. Easter candy, we bring Easter candy Easter candy... I got some in my car! Chocolate eggs and jelly beans The finest Easter Day cuisine Chocolate eggs jelly beans Easter Day fine cuisine O-o-o-o-oh... Easter Bunnies, we are Easter Bunnies We hop along the Bunny Trail right into your backyard. Easter Bunnies, we are pink and fuzzy Pink and fuzzy, and we have big ears. Easter candy, we bring Easter candy Easter candy... We chose this for careers! Easter baskets, colored eggs We hop around on bunny legs Easter baskets colored eggs Hop around bunny legs Chocolate eggs jelly beans Easter Day fine cuisine O-o-o-o-oh... Easter Bunnies, we are Easter Bunnies Easter bunnies, that is what we are.
Deck the tree with balls so flashy. Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la la la. Homemade ornaments just look trashy. We bring joy and memory sharing. We were made with love and caring You were made with paste and pine tar -- We're not even sure what you are! You're just copies, we are handmade. We have charms that never will fade. Even though you came before us... Let's all be one happy chorus! We're with you and glad to be here! Fa la la, la la la, la la la Merry Christmas, Happy New Year!
Cant wait for the date its nearly here. Love the mood, love the food at this time of year Need a plan for the clan when they gather near. Soon well dine on Thanksgiving Day! Time to shop, time to chop, time to stuff a bird. Roast and baste, salt to taste, check the temperature. Make the sides, bake the pies, keep the gravy stirred. Soon well dine on Thanksgiving Day. Turkeys done, got to run clean the mess and greet the guests, when they come to the door. Time to eat, find a seat, make a toast to our fine host (and check the football score!) Say the grace, keep the pace time to carve so we dont starve Do you want dark or light? Pass the peas and cranberries Got our eyes on the pies May we please take a bite? Were thankful for all that weve been given yes were thankful that if we overeat well be forgiven Cause thanks-giv-ing comes but once a year to celebrate with those so dear and we must state: That as our waistline expands, were grateful for our stretchy pants. Oh, snap! Were hoping that with all the bloat we dont look like a Macys float! Now its time for a nap. Tooooo-morrow when our coma lifts Its to the mall for Christmas gifts This holiday was off the hook, well worth the time and work it took! and look be sure you dont forget to kiss the cook! tag: However you spend it, hope your Thanksgiving is happy!
Passover's coming, Everyone's running, Preparing something for the Seder meal! Matzo-balls are stewing Chicken-soup is brewing, Everything we're doing With a special zeal! Quick, set the Seder plate, Hurry, it's getting late, Shank bone... roasted egg... Where's the bitter herb!? Cover the matzos up, Fill up Elijah's cup, Chop some potatoes up, Those will be superb! Oh! No! One hour to go! Make charoset and some moror! Sweep the kitchen! Wash the floor-or! Cut horseradish if you're able! Put Haggadahs on the table! Pour the wine! Pour the wine! Collapse... and... have... a... great... night! Happy Passover!
Hark! How the chins, Upside-down chins, Smooth or with beard, All will be heard! Christmas is here. Bringing good cheer. Lips, teeth, and tongue, Songs will be sung. Round and oblong, Singing their song, Whiskers or not, Chins sing a lot. One seems to hear, Words of good cheer, From every chin, Singing again. Oh! how they sing. Voices do ring. O'er nose and face, Going every place. Gaily mouths chew, While chins renew. Goodwill and cheer, Christmas is here. Merry, merry, merry, merry Christmas. Merry, merry, merry, merry Christmas. Oh, how the chins, Sing with their grins, Their melody, So chinfully Merry Christmas!
Happy April Fools' Day! Exit. System Error. That's it?! OK. Think About it. These emails don't just spontaneously burst into existence, you know. Programmers actually have to spend time coding these suckers. OK. Enrich Your Life! I mean, really! Will a few more minutes of art appreciation hurt you? Think of the poor sap who sat at a desk, coloring this thing in. OK. Be Considerate of Others. And don't be too quick to forget about the nice person who sent you this email. Do you think they give these things away for free? No way - somebody shelled out big bucks for this baby. OK. Are You Sure? Are you positively SURE you want to exit this program? OK. Ok, then... Well, OK, then... OK. You're a Persistent One, Aren't You? If you really want to exit this program, I won't stop you. OK. Last One, I Promise! ...except to wish you a happy April Fools' Day one last time. OK. Honestly, This Is the Last One. Happy April Fools' Day! OK. Gullible. Boy, you'll believe anything you read, won't you? OK. Other Explanation? Or is the button-pushing thing some kind of compulsion? OK. Enough, Already. Hey, I don't have all day, you know! Do you want to exit this program or not?! OK. Finally! Then why didn't you say so in the first place?! OK. In honor of April Fools' Day, this complete waste of time has been brought to you by .
This Thanksgiving's gonna be great -- Gonna see my Grandpa, and my sister Kate, Mom and Auntie Anna and perhaps my cousin Hannah. This Thanksgiving's gonna be great. This Thanksgiving's gonna be sweet -- With dressing, mash potatoes and some pumpkin pie to eat. I could write a pretty ballad 'bout my Grandma's green bean salad. This Thanksgiving's gonna be sweet. This Thanksgiving's gonna be great -- And it's my arrival, folks await. I'm grateful, to be clear, I've made it one more year This Thanksgiving's gonna be great! Hope your turkey day is a great one!
Wellllllllllllllllllllll theres Cabbage and shamrocks and Irish hearts prancing and claddagh rings (dandy for handy romancing) and lucks all around us with leprechauns dancing plus lots of good wishes for Saint Patricks Day Theres wolfhounds and Guinness and music quite airy and corned beef a-cooking and smiles all merry parades in the morning from Dublin to Derry plus happy good wishes for Saint Patricks Daaaaaaaaaaaaay!
Is it hot in here? ...or is it just me? I provide beauty, warmth and light for the whole family. When these 8 candles are all lighted, Though it's clear everyone's excited, In my glow they will bask, but I just have to ask: Is it hot in here, or is it just me? Is it warm in here? I have to say I spend most of the year packed up away, Though the food is frying in the kitchen, I'm the one who's really schvitzin' With 9 sticks of fire, I just have to inquire: Is it hot in here, or is it just me? Warmest wishes for a Happy Hanukkah.
Working at the North Pole building toys out of a wooden block can surely put a damper on your day. Being two feet tall and having pointy ears and hats and shoes can also limit jobs with decent pay. Having Santa for a boss may sound exciting for a while, but really its just basically okay. This busy time of the year, its hard to keep running around like this. Scooping after reindeers just another thing we have to do, Santa likes the snow all clean and white. Answering the letters that the Fat Man gets from everywhere and they dont stop arriving day or night. We need a break our little feet ache, you think its easy making sure that red suit fits? Decorating Christmas trees and harvesting the mistletoe, you cant do all this working 9 to 5. Sure were sweet and jolly and were cute as boughs of holly, but these holidays put us in overdrive. We guess its fun, and when alls said and done, we hope your Christmas is the best one yet. Merry Christmas from one hard-working little elf to another.
Dads are loving, Ever-caring, Patient and hard-working, too. There with love when things go either Really good or bad for you. Dads would yell, and clap and whistle, When you'd given it your all, Even when you were quite little, Dad made you feel 10-feet tall. Even when he had to tell you, "Because I said so, that's why!" Or "If I have to come up there," Dad is still an awesome guy So to honor Dad and thank him On this third Sunday in June, Just to state that dads are great, we're Bringing you this classic tune! Happy Father's Day
CHIN #1: In the fourth week of November As Im sure were all aware, We celebrate Thanksgiving And we eat till were impaired. Watch some football on the TV And parades with relatives, No one spills the gravy On the tablecloth and lives. ALL CHINS: Turkey on the table Its Thanksgiving Day Sauce made from cranberries, Broccoli souffl, When I eat more food Than a rabid beast, Youll know its at the annual Thanksgiving feast. CHIN #2: I see yams and I see brussel sprouts And green bean casserole, Mashed potatoes and hot stuffing Overflowing from the bowl. CHIN #3: Then theres pumpkin pie and whipped cream Triple layer carrot cake, My chin gets tired from chewing And I have a tummy ache. ALL CHINS: Turkey on the table Its Thanksgiving Day Sauce made from cranberries, Broccoli souffl, When I eat more food Than a rabid beast, Youll know its at the annual Thanksgiving feast. Happy Thanksgiving, Everybody
Thanks for being organized when others fail to be. Thanks for your performance and your punctuality. Thanks for all the things you do that others simply can't. Thanks for being cool and calm while others rave and rant. Thanks for doing mindless tasks that make you wanna swear. But, mostly, thank you very much for always being there! Happy Administrative Professionals Day
Cupid never misses the mark when hes hooking other people up, but some of his own pick-up lines? Well, you be the judge Whats your sign, honey? Mines the Archer, and I always hit the target, if you know what I mean Baby, once you go Cupid, the rest are just stupid. Whoa, is that an arrow in my diaper or am I just happy to see you? My Cloud 9 or yours? My name is Cupid, but you can call me the God of Love because I am, the God of Love. Really, it says so right here on my drivers license. Do you believe in love at first sight or should I do another flyby? Wanna go back to my well, crib? No, not working for ya? Well, baby, this will! Its Valentines Day - watch your back, Sweetie!
March seventeenth is what we call St. Patricks Day Shoemaking leprechauns hoard all their gold away Clovers with four leafs can make a Good Luck bouquet As we sing out the St. Patricks Chin Song. When Irish chins sing, its a song you can dance to, lad Whisky and lager can cheer you up if youre sad Pipes may be calling, but Murphys heads feeling bad Corned beef and cabbage is coming on strong. Red-headed lasses will ask you so freely, Is that your shillelagh or you glad to see me? A rainbow and pot of gold wait round the bend And if youre not Irish, well, you can pretend. Pubs barely open but Flanagans bleary-eyed Shamrocks and Blarney Stones got Kelly teary-eyed Father OMalleys on his second beer and rye As we sing loud the St. Patricks Chin Song. O lets lift a glass up to Cork and Kilkenny Wed name all the counties, but there are too many Our Irish Pride comes out of each nook and cranny When we sing out the St. Patricks Chin Song. Red-headed lasses will ask you so freely, Is that your shillelagh or you glad to see me? A rainbow and pot of gold wait round the bend If you like this stanza, well sing it again. Red-headed lasses will ask you so freely, Is that your shillelagh or you glad to see me? A rainbow and pot of gold wait round the bend And St. Patricks Day Chin Song has come to an end!
I thought I'd seen the last of you, And you want to see the end of me, Well Honey, this turkey won't be deceased for your Thanksgiving feast (just listen to me now!) I'm gonna make it! I know I can! I'm gonna live to see December, put away your roasting pan, I'm gonna miss out on being dished out, Hope mashed potatoes fill you up Cuz this turkey won't be stuffed You can have your yams and cranberries Have some pumpkin pie, but you can't have me! When the cookin' starts on that cold Thursday, This bold bird will be M.I.A. The main course has flown the coop. Drumsticks don't fail me now! I'm gonna make it! I know I can! I'm gonna live to see December, put down that roasting pan, Yes I'm a winner, not your family dinner Hope the dressing is enough Cuz this turkey won't be stuffed (Get a cow if ya wanna chow!) (you want some protein? serve some beans!)
Inn the grate cosmic scheme of things, administrative professional are like gravity. They keep things from spinning out of control. But unlike gravity they never let you down. Just want you to knoww that you certrtannly deserve the best. unfortunaetely, of ccourse, you'e stukk witth us. Hanhgpy Admisghtive Proshefunals Day, ashuhsvaow. Hdnrpy Admisghtive Proshefunals Dai, anzdlmdev. Haapy Administraytiv Profeshunals Day, anyhow. (hey, this typing thing isn't soo harde...)