Thanks for being organized when others fail to be. Thanks for your performance and your punctuality. Thanks for all the things you do that others simply can't. Thanks for being cool and calm while others rave and rant. Thanks for doing mindless tasks that make you wanna swear. But, mostly, thank you very much for always being there! Happy Administrative Professionals Day
Who gets up each day, just to earn his pay? Who's fearless and dependable and true? Who's the MVP of his family? Dad is, that's who! If you need advice With some tech device, he's up to every task. If you're stuck, or you Need a buck or two? You only have to ask. Who should just unwind, have a rest, recline? Take a break from all he does the whole year through? Yes -- who's number one for the things he's done? Dad is, that's who Dad is -- that's YOU!! Relax -- you've earned it! Happy Father's Day
An optimist sees the glass as half full... A pessimist sees the glass as half empty... A mother sees the glass of someone who didn't finish their drink, pick up their glass, or put it in the dishwasher. Happy Mother's Day!
Deck the tree with balls so flashy. Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la la la. Homemade ornaments just look trashy. We bring joy and memory sharing. We were made with love and caring You were made with paste and pine tar -- We're not even sure what you are! You're just copies, we are handmade. We have charms that never will fade. Even though you came before us... Let's all be one happy chorus! We're with you and glad to be here! Fa la la, la la la, la la la Merry Christmas, Happy New Year!
I thought I'd seen the last of you, And you want to see the end of me, Well Honey, this turkey won't be deceased for your Thanksgiving feast (just listen to me now!) I'm gonna make it! I know I can! I'm gonna live to see December, put away your roasting pan, I'm gonna miss out on being dished out, Hope mashed potatoes fill you up Cuz this turkey won't be stuffed You can have your yams and cranberries Have some pumpkin pie, but you can't have me! When the cookin' starts on that cold Thursday, This bold bird will be M.I.A. The main course has flown the coop. Drumsticks don't fail me now! I'm gonna make it! I know I can! I'm gonna live to see December, put down that roasting pan, Yes I'm a winner, not your family dinner Hope the dressing is enough Cuz this turkey won't be stuffed (Get a cow if ya wanna chow!) (you want some protein? serve some beans!)
It's time to get funky, (recipient's name)! Yow! Hey! Hey! Hey! Come on! We gotta, gotta sing about (special occasion)! Let's celebrate! This is gonna be great! Cut loose! And go (favorite activity) You're the greatest one around! Put on your (favorite clothes) Can you dig what I'm puttin' down! Let's get funky! Wow! I'll say it again (special occasion)! Wow! Hear me now! Have a funkadelic day!
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Ready, OK! Here's a song for a Dad named (recipient) Give that man a trophy He's a Dad who know his stuff He really rocks (personal characteristic) He's a man who's really tough. He's a Dad who (favorite activity) Stand proud! Stand tall! He's a Dad who loves (favorite food) He's the greatest Dad of all! Gooooo Dad! Happy Dad's Day!
Cupid never misses the mark when hes hooking other people up, but some of his own pick-up lines? Well, you be the judge Whats your sign, honey? Mines the Archer, and I always hit the target, if you know what I mean Baby, once you go Cupid, the rest are just stupid. Whoa, is that an arrow in my diaper or am I just happy to see you? My Cloud 9 or yours? My name is Cupid, but you can call me the God of Love because I am, the God of Love. Really, it says so right here on my drivers license. Do you believe in love at first sight or should I do another flyby? Wanna go back to my well, crib? No, not working for ya? Well, baby, this will! Its Valentines Day - watch your back, Sweetie!
March seventeenth is what we call St. Patricks Day Shoemaking leprechauns hoard all their gold away Clovers with four leafs can make a Good Luck bouquet As we sing out the St. Patricks Chin Song. When Irish chins sing, its a song you can dance to, lad Whisky and lager can cheer you up if youre sad Pipes may be calling, but Murphys heads feeling bad Corned beef and cabbage is coming on strong. Red-headed lasses will ask you so freely, Is that your shillelagh or you glad to see me? A rainbow and pot of gold wait round the bend And if youre not Irish, well, you can pretend. Pubs barely open but Flanagans bleary-eyed Shamrocks and Blarney Stones got Kelly teary-eyed Father OMalleys on his second beer and rye As we sing loud the St. Patricks Chin Song. O lets lift a glass up to Cork and Kilkenny Wed name all the counties, but there are too many Our Irish Pride comes out of each nook and cranny When we sing out the St. Patricks Chin Song. Red-headed lasses will ask you so freely, Is that your shillelagh or you glad to see me? A rainbow and pot of gold wait round the bend If you like this stanza, well sing it again. Red-headed lasses will ask you so freely, Is that your shillelagh or you glad to see me? A rainbow and pot of gold wait round the bend And St. Patricks Day Chin Song has come to an end!
Moms are loving, Ever-caring, Really understanding, too. There with love when things go either Really good or bad for you. Even when you wouldn't wash up, Clean your room, or just say "please," Mom was there with love and guidance During trying times like these. Moms will always clap the loudest, When you've given it your all, Even when you were quite little, Mom made you feel 10-feet tall. So we honor Mom and thank her Each year on this week in May, And wish her with all our hearts A truly classic Mother's Day! Enjoy Your Day!
CHIN #1: In the fourth week of November As Im sure were all aware, We celebrate Thanksgiving And we eat till were impaired. Watch some football on the TV And parades with relatives, No one spills the gravy On the tablecloth and lives. ALL CHINS: Turkey on the table Its Thanksgiving Day Sauce made from cranberries, Broccoli souffl, When I eat more food Than a rabid beast, Youll know its at the annual Thanksgiving feast. CHIN #2: I see yams and I see brussel sprouts And green bean casserole, Mashed potatoes and hot stuffing Overflowing from the bowl. CHIN #3: Then theres pumpkin pie and whipped cream Triple layer carrot cake, My chin gets tired from chewing And I have a tummy ache. ALL CHINS: Turkey on the table Its Thanksgiving Day Sauce made from cranberries, Broccoli souffl, When I eat more food Than a rabid beast, Youll know its at the annual Thanksgiving feast. Happy Thanksgiving, Everybody
Inn the grate cosmic scheme of things, administrative professional are like gravity. They keep things from spinning out of control. But unlike gravity they never let you down. Just want you to knoww that you certrtannly deserve the best. unfortunaetely, of ccourse, you'e stukk witth us. Hanhgpy Admisghtive Proshefunals Day, ashuhsvaow. Hdnrpy Admisghtive Proshefunals Dai, anzdlmdev. Haapy Administraytiv Profeshunals Day, anyhow. (hey, this typing thing isn't soo harde...)
The story of St. Patricks Day begins in Ireland On hillsides with the green, green grass Beneath the Irish sun. St. Patty put this grass of green in baskets he did weave, and filled them up with chocolate eggs For children to receive. uhm, actually, I think youve got it wrong, therelisten to thisahem. St. Pattys Day commemorates a date from long ago: The Pilgrims and the natives dined, on food that they did grow, along with fish and turkeys too, they ate their peas and corn, They later added football, and a holiday was born. NO...no...no ya eejit! Thats not it St. Padddys day is when the kids go around with their scary masks and Achhh! You doont have the sense you were born with, Lad, its when Santa comes down the chimn That shows what you know... Make no mistake about it Im wishing you a Happy St. Patricks Day! and then if the turkey sees his shadow... For some No Blarney Facts About St. Patricks Day, click any of the Shamrocks! sharmrock #1 St. Patricks Day is the annual feast of St. Patrick (circa AD 385-461), a patron saint of Ireland. According to legend, St. Patrick used the green three-leaf clover (the shamrock) to explain the holy trinity to the Christians of Ireland. This is how the wearing of the green became a tradition. sharmrock #2 Although an Irish holiday, the largest St. Patricks Day parade in the world is in New York City, where 150,000 marchers participate. sharmrock #3 The Chicago River is dyed green each year for St. Patricks Day. sharmrock #4 In Canada, the UK, Australia, New Zealand, Argentina and the US, St. Patricks Day is not an official holiday, but is widely celebrated.
Youre a mommy, youre a mother, Its a job thats like no other: Its demanding, and its draining, Its a job for which there really was no training. Wiping counters, butts and noses, Cleaning up while famly dozes. Making sure kids wear clean undies, Working all week long, plus Saturdays and Sund-ies. Kissing boo boos, multi-tasking, Know your kids hurt without asking. Gasoline goes by the tank-full, Its for all of this and more your familys thankful! Happy Mothers Day!
Hark! How the chins, Upside-down chins, Smooth or with beard, All will be heard! Christmas is here. Bringing good cheer. Lips, teeth, and tongue, Songs will be sung. Round and oblong, Singing their song, Whiskers or not, Chins sing a lot. One seems to hear, Words of good cheer, From every chin, Singing again. Oh! how they sing. Voices do ring. O'er nose and face, Going every place. Gaily mouths chew, While chins renew. Goodwill and cheer, Christmas is here. Merry, merry, merry, merry Christmas. Merry, merry, merry, merry Christmas. Oh, how the chins, Sing with their grins, Their melody, So chinfully Merry Christmas!
Working at the North Pole building toys out of a wooden block can surely put a damper on your day. Being two feet tall and having pointy ears and hats and shoes can also limit jobs with decent pay. Having Santa for a boss may sound exciting for a while, but really its just basically okay. This busy time of the year, its hard to keep running around like this. Scooping after reindeers just another thing we have to do, Santa likes the snow all clean and white. Answering the letters that the Fat Man gets from everywhere and they dont stop arriving day or night. We need a break our little feet ache, you think its easy making sure that red suit fits? Decorating Christmas trees and harvesting the mistletoe, you cant do all this working 9 to 5. Sure were sweet and jolly and were cute as boughs of holly, but these holidays put us in overdrive. We guess its fun, and when alls said and done, we hope your Christmas is the best one yet. Merry Christmas from one hard-working little elf to another.
Once upon a time, in a land far away, there was a handsome man who appreciated women for their minds. A man who preferred brains and a sense of humor over a roll in the hay, a man in search of commitment... Thought you might enjoy a good fairy tale on Valentine's Day!
Is it hot in here? ...or is it just me? I provide beauty, warmth and light for the whole family. When these 8 candles are all lighted, Though it's clear everyone's excited, In my glow they will bask, but I just have to ask: Is it hot in here, or is it just me? Is it warm in here? I have to say I spend most of the year packed up away, Though the food is frying in the kitchen, I'm the one who's really schvitzin' With 9 sticks of fire, I just have to inquire: Is it hot in here, or is it just me? Warmest wishes for a Happy Hanukkah.
Top Five Leprechaun Complaints Number Five This cereal is neither magical nor delicious! Number Four Its hard to hold your whiskey when youre built like a four-year-old. Number Three If I hear, Top o the mornin to ya! one more time, someones gonna get hurt! Number Two Every time I wash me leprechaun outfit, me entire laundry turns green! And the Number One Leprechaun Complaint Tiny little leprechaun. Tiny little shillelagh! Happy St. Patricks Day