Top 5 Excuses for Missing Your Birthday 5. The string I tied around my finger (so I wouldn't forget) came off in the shower. 4. The video of my cat playing the piano went viral, and I thought I was too good for my old acquaintances. 3. I was busy taking a bullet for the president. 2. I was putting on a puppet show for neighborhood kids, and they insisted on several encores. And the number one reason: I'm the worst. Anyway, Happy Birthday!
Gray hair -- and lots of wrinkled skin that's sagging, Just when in the world did this begin? I swear! If I'm not sleeping, then I'm dragging! This phase of life will do me in! Goodness, gracious! Why am I so tired? All the aches and pains that I've acquired Seem to sap my very will -- I need a nap -- I need a pill! Hand me down my shawl, 'cause I'm afraid I've caught a chill. Holy moly! Why are we so tired? Seems our lifetime battery's expired. As sure as ocean leads to shore, As sure as dinnertime's at 4! We'll need a second wind before we rest FOR EVER-MORE! Hope your birthday is a classic!
Thanks for being organized when others fail to be. Thanks for your leadership and strong integrity. Thanks for all the things you do with never a complaint. Thanks for being cool and calm and showing such restraint. Thanks for your support and all the wisdom that you share. But, mostly, thank you very much for always being there! You deserve to have an awesome Boss's Day.
It's Halloveen... and I just vanted to say... Hello my baby Halloveen evening Happiest day all year. I've been cooped up enough, Tonight I can strut my stuff. Halloveen candy, It's mighty dandy -- The party is here Music is in the air Tonight we spook and scare. Pumpkins are lighted, We're all excited, Raise up a glass of cheer, I've got to catch a flight! Have an amazing night! Wishing you a SPOOK-tacular Halloween
Oooh, I can tell by the spooky moon Halloween is comin' soon Werewolves howwwwwwwwl and run around Zombies crawl up from underground Witchin' night is almost here and you don't got a thing to fear Don't you know that-- I heard it in the grave yard Havin' fun just ain't that hard Oooh, I heard it in the grave yard Time to stroll out from the boulevard Mummy, mummy yeah I know that roaming the streets at night Could cause some folks to get a fright. Ooooh, I heard it in the grave yard Havin' fun just ain't that hard Ooooh, I heard it in the grave yard Time to stroll out from the boulevard Mummy, mummy yeah Candy corn and other sweets will fill my bag with lots of treats. Hope Your Halloween Is Frightfully Happy!
When the moon hits your eye like a big-a pizza pie That's amore That's amore When the world seems to shine Like you've had too much wine That's amore That's amore When you walk in a dream And you know you're not dreaming signore 'Scusami, but you see Back in old Napoli, That's amore That's amore Have a Happy Valentine's Day and many amore!
(song lyrics) : Valentine's Day / It's when love is in the air / A day for sweet candy on your lips / Sweet nothings in your ear / Candy kisses roses red / Everywhere the love is spread / Fills your heart with such a glow / Feels so good oh oh / If Cupid sets his sight on you / Ain't nothing baby you can do / Let him pull that string back on his bow / Pierce you with his love arrow / Now can't you just feel it / It's the day for Valentines / Hoping yours is extra fine / And I'm here to simply say / Since you're totally the best / B - E - S - T / Such a cut above the rest / Such a cut above the rest / Happy Valentine's Day!
Hope your Valentine's is a sweet day, a neat day, zoppit-a-beet-day. Gonna be a real special Valentine and everything is gonna be just fine. Whoa-oh-oh. Yeah. Hope your Valentine's Day is something to sing about!
SENTIMENT P.1 How Dogs Celebrate Valentine's Day 1. Rise at 5:30 a.m. wet-nose the master. 2. Go out and pee on the world. 3. Make poopy. 4. Sniff poopy. 5. Seriously think about eating poopy. 6. Eat funny looking bug instead. 7. Throw up bug parts on living room rug. 8. Drink out of magic well. 9. Sleep for 17 hours. Start all over again. Hope your Valentine's Day is just as much fun! (Except for the 'poopy' thing.) 10. Roll around in filth, then lavish Master with kisses.
Hey there (recipient's name) Today is (occasion) Wanna send a little slice of paradise your way! Straight from (sender's name) Hope you're (favorite activity) Do whatever you want, cause it's a special day! Out at the tiki hut, Take a drink from a coconut! Sing songs by the ocean front, for you. These sunny skies -- so blue, A little bar with an ocean view, Singin' this song, just for you. Sending a little song just for you!
Easter Sunday! Eat your candy! Hallelujah! Eat your candy! Hallelujah! Choc'late bunnies! Choc'late bunnies! In the basket! They're fantastic! The grass is plastic! Eat every jelly bean -- The yellow, pink and green! Hallelujah! Eat your candy! Hallelujah! Eat your candy! Hallelujah! Hope your Easter begins and ends on a happy note!
Oh, kiss me I'm Irish, It's grand being green! Whether just for the day or forever. We've got all the blarney, We've got all the luck, We're witty, good-looking and clever! Oh, kiss me I'm Irish, It's fun being green! We're charming, outspoken and friendly, There's two types of people: There's those who are green, And those who are just green with envy! Happy St. Patrick's Day!
This is a happy Boss's Day wish just for you, the... always-there-for-me, would-do-anything-for-me, trustworthy-loyal-helpful-friendly wouldn't-want-another, couldn't want-a-better, thanks-for-all-you-do-for-me Happy Boss's Day!
Aint got no room for haters Cuz Im spreadin the love As Im rainin down my arrows From the heavens above When I send one in the air, its like an angel chorus sings Cuz I got ice on my nappies & bling on my wings. See, Im Q to the P to the I to tha D My aim is true, and yall agree Yeah, Q to the P to the I to tha D Its Valentines Day, yall, thanks to me. Yea, February One-Four is my day to shine Seen around the world on lotsa Valentines Blessin all yer candy hearts with my Heavenly flows, & Lyrics silky-smoother than a thorn-less rose. Do my fly-bys, then sip up on some pink champagne, In My Crib on Cloud Nine Just off of Lovers Ln. See, Im Q to the P to the I to tha D My aim is true, and yall agree Yeah, Q to the P to the I to tha D & Thats My Valentines Rapping Spree. Happy Valentine's Day, Yo!
A Dad is An Amazing Man... When he sits in a recliner, IT gets relaxed. He wouldn't mind showing his feminine side...if he had one. No shirt, no shoes---he always gets service. He once asked for directions...just kidding. Google once asked him to find something. He doesn't cut the grass. The grass bows to him. Happy Father's Day to an Amazing Man!
It's Thanksgiving! What are you thankful for? I'm thankful for the extra naptime! I'm thankful for the extra leftovers! I'm thankful for this great disguise! I'm thankful for wonderful people like you! Wishing you a very Happy Thanksgiving!
We do it all because we're dads. Because we're dads! Because we're dads! We do it all because we're dads! Well Mr. Construction Is what my friends call me 'Cause all of the jobs I do are so manly, But find me at home And you'll probably see I'm the number one client at my daughter's tea party. If it's broken, we can fix it Duct tape makes it all work fine. There's no need to read a recipe -- They're just a waste of time. Do not tell Mom! We're your biggest fan, we know the score to every game you play, If your diaper's kinda smelly, Well, we'll make it go away. We don't mean to embarrass you when driving you to school... Because we're dads! Because we're dads! We do it all because we're dads! Because we're dads! Because we're dads! We do it all because we're dads! Happy "Dads" Day!
There's the kinda strong Like a country song When the lead guitar's on fire. There's the kind like a fighter Or a rodeo rider There's the kind like a steel-belt tire. There sure are lots of different Kinds-a strong -- that's surely true, But none compare, any time anywhere To a DAD STRONG dude like you! Chorus: DAD STRONG! Dad strong! ...and it fills our hearts with gratitude. DAD STRONG! Can't be wrong! ...with a thousand watts of DAD-i-tude. DAD STRONG! Can I get an oh yeah? Happy Father's Day!
'Tis a fine day at sea, me matey, RECIPIENT -- Ship shape and the skies be clear. We're celebratin' OCCASION Heave ho, ye buccaneer! So raise your mug of BEVERAGE, Before it's too late, me hearty. SENDER would like to say, "Come on, let's have a party!" RECIPIENT
OK...Scary. Alright - 1, 2, 3, Go! I'm a scary bat, eek, eek eek, give me some candy or I'll bite some holes in you. Are you scared? No? OK. I am death at your doorstep. I'll get you my pretty. I am 100 years old - that's 700 in dog years. You were playing with the Ouija board and now you must pay! I am not a dog with a sheet, I am an evil ghost. Am I scaring you yet? How 'bout now? I saw you flinch! Boo! Eek! Rawr! Oh man. Mom, you're not making my costumes any more, I can't scare anybody. Wishing you a little fright on Halloween night!