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Archives for May 2018

How to make Hygge happen in spring

May 14 By American Greetings

(And share it with those you love)

A cozy Hygge place shown with soft blankets, warm coffee, the glow of candlelight and a good book.

Maybe you’ve heard of it. Or maybe you’re thinking, “hy-what?” Either way, there’s a good chance you’ve experienced hygge.

It’s pronounced HOO-ga. (Not quite what you were expecting, right?) Hygge is the Scandinavian philosophy of comfort and coziness. It’s not just a word; it’s a way of life, a sense of togetherness and connectedness – known all too well by the people of Denmark who are considered the happiest people in the world despite the region’s long, dark winters.

So, is it only a cold weather thing? Heck, no. “Hygge is about an atmosphere and an experience, rather than about things,” writes Meik Wiking, author of “The Little Book of Hygge: Danish Secrets to Happy Living.” “It is about being with the people we love.” It can be the smell of spring, a mug of hot cocoa by the fireside, reading a great book, the feeling you get from connecting to something meaningful, and especially spending time with your favorite people.

As spring brings new blooms and warmth from the sun we can all appreciate – what better time to create and connect with your happy place and share some hygge with those you love? We’ll get you started with some ideas you can do with a friend, your child, your partner, or even just for yourself.

Hygge with your friend

A tray holding a candle and friendship plant to remind you of your time together picking out a plant.

  • Share a pot of ‘thank you’ tea.
    Pick an afternoon or early evening, simmer some relaxing tea, and show a friend your gratitude by giving them your undivided attention and sharing good conversation (sans cell phones).
  • Hike and a fire.
    The smell of the earth as spring begins and the scent of wood smoke curling in the air are two of our favorite smells of all time. Experience the best of both by heading off for a hike then unwinding fireside afterwards. #awesomeday
  • From cyberspace to your space.
    Get those pics off of your phone and up on your wall. (They can’t make you smile hiding in a cloud.) Choose your faves and frame them up so you’re reminded every day of those priceless moments and the friends that made them happen.
  • Brunch via video.
    Let’s face it, sometimes you just don’t want to get out of bed on the weekend to meet your wolfpack for brunch. So change it up – leave the pj’s on and have everyone brunch via video chat. This is especially cool if you’ve got friendly faces in faraway places – coffee talk with friends is the ultimate, especially when you can stay in your bunny slippers.
  • Share a friendship plant.
    Next time you’re together, head to the local garden center and pick out a plant for each other or buy the same one. Now you’ll have a super springtime reminder of your friend as you watch your plant thrive and flourish. (Just like friendship. ‘wink’)

Hygge with your child

A DIY craft made with yarn and a paper plate with hygge design elements.

  • Decorate their room with this cheerful homemade yarn craft.
    The design of hygge is all about clean shapes and earthy color palettes, but it’s the together time in creating this piece that counts the most. This yarn craft is the perfect thing to make to hang in your child’s room, so grab some yarn and craft a memory.
  • Plant garden seeds and watch them grow.
    Have the kids create the space where they play. Purchase some seeds of their choice and help plant them in the yard so they can watch their handiwork bloom through the spring.
  • Press flowers.
    Take a walk with your child to gather nature’s gems and jewels then press them in pages to frame, or string them up. It’s a great way to bring spring indoors to decorate your space, as well as create a priceless memory.
  • Create a hyggekrog (or nook) in a sunny window spot.
    Gather your child’s favorite cozy blankets and pillows for the perfect togetherness space where you can get lost in your favorite books.
  • Bring the inside out.
    Lay down a blanket in the yard and keep your eyes to the skies – what shapes do you see in the clouds? At night, point out constellations and keep a lookout for shooting stars. Since the air may still be a bit chilly at night, be sure to layer up before you look up.

Hygge with your partner

3 cards with warm wishes - huggable sweetness, sending a huggle and sharing good times together.

  • Massage and a movie.
    Get those sheets off the bed and onto the floor for you and your partner to have a good old fashioned slumber party in the comfort of your home. Get your lineup of movies going and take turns giving back massages for the ultimate in entertainment relaxation.
  • Build something together.
    What would be spring without a little cleaning and a small (or big) renovation project?
    Roll up your sleeves and dig into that ‘room re-do’ or list of repairs that you both keep saying you’ll get around to. This stuff is always more fun with two.
  • Print those pics – and frame them!
    Nothing says home like your own memories right in front of your eyes. What an awesome reminder of all the special moments and people you have in your life.
  • Toast to togetherness.
    Uncork a bottle of wine and every time you ‘cheers,’ say out loud two things you’re grateful for. Not only are those grapes giving you a little health kick, but expressing gratitude boosts your heart and mental health as well. (Clink, clink!)
  • Make a nursery date – to refresh your home.
    Spend an afternoon together picking out fragrant flowers and eye-catching plants to give your home a fresh, spring feeling. Not only can plants totally bring out the personality of a space, but they also help clean the air in your home, so your lungs also get a good dusting with every breath. Ahh…

Hygge yourself

A warm phrase illustrated beautifully and available in a free download for your daily hygge inspiration.

Click here or on the image above for the free printable phrase.

  • Set up your writing space.
    Create a space where you keep cards, notes, stamps, etc. and designate that area for your card and letter writing to connect with friends and family. When you have a specific place set aside to do this, you’ll see how easy and natural it is to make sure your best intentions make it to the mailbox…and straight to their hearts. If you need some inspiration on what to write inside a card, we have a whole lot of that for you here.
  • Let the light in.
    With spring arriving, the daylight is deliciously lingering longer and longer, so head to your favorite feel-good store and pick out some fresh new curtains that filter more light into your space, creating a cheery, warm atmosphere.
  • Frame your favorite phrase (or this printable).
    What phrase or quote inspires you every time you read it? Print it out in a cool font, frame it, and hang in your home for that daily dose of inspiration. Or go ahead and download this one we created to remind yourself to connect with others in a meaningful way.
  • Meditate, rotate, repeat.
    Rotate your relaxation or meditation practice from indoors to outdoors to maximize your connection to nature and refresh your body and spirit. Namaste.
  • Splurge on what makes you smile.
    Every now and then you just gotta have that thing that brings you joy. Allow yourself that special purchase. New couch? Pretty bedspread? That metal chicken holding a daisy that makes you think of your mom? Get it. Having something in your surroundings that makes you smile and feel good will make your space even more enjoyable to be in, and better yet – those good vibes will stick to you when you head out the door, too.

At the end of the day, hygge is all about gratitude, sharing, and the pursuit of happiness. Now that’s an idea we can all get behind.

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Filed Under: Family, Friendship, Spring Tagged With: Friendship, home trends, hygge, next generation, spring, spring ideas

Keepsakes from my kids

May 7 By American Greetings

Keepsakes From My Kids by Kathy Davis

It’s almost Mother’s Day again and that means that the lucky moms among us are likely to receive delightful greeting cards, sentimental gifts, maybe even some handmade tokens of love. And if you’re like me, you’ll have a hard time ever parting with these precious keepsakes.

I used to save EVERYTHING — my own dear mother dubbed me a “pack rat” — especially when it came from my kids! And now that my Ben and Katie are all grown up, these saved memories are especially poignant.

It’s hard to think of anything that means more to us than receiving cards from our children. The beautiful artwork and sentiments touch our hearts, making us feel loved and appreciated.

A heart cut out of paper and finger painted by a child makes a great keepsake for mom.

If you’re as sentimental as I am, you might enjoy re-reading these heartfelt messages more than once through the years. Keeping greeting cards tucked away in a safe place allows us revisit those warm feelings whenever we need to, especially when we’re having a bad day.

Words really do mean everything. They get to the truth of how we feel about the people we love. (If you need help with what to write in a Mother’s Day card for your own mother, you can find some helpful suggestions here.)

In addition to greeting cards, I also saved report cards, photos from every grade in school, art masterpieces, scrapbooks from family vacations, even old Christmas lists the kids made for Santa. And then there are the handmade gift items — crafts made in school, macaroni necklaces, clay pots and trinket boxes.  All of these are such sweet reminders of those days that passed all too fast.

A vintage picture of Kathy Davis with her children when they were young.

One of my personal favorite mementos is a sticky note I found on my desk many years ago. As a single mom, I had just started my own design business working from a drawing table in the corner of my bedroom. My kids watched me put in long hours juggling family and the demands of my new enterprise. So my daughter, Katie, surprised me with the most thoughtful message!

A keepsake for mom - a handmade card from her child

Katie’s note was a touching reminder for me. A reminder to enjoy each and every day… and not take things too seriously. I taped that note to the front of my planner where it remained for many years.

I still need this same reminder today. I think we all do.

Now that my daughter is a mom herself, she is passing on her thoughtfulness to her 20-month-old son, Sam.  So far, I have received a Christmas reindeer made from Sam’s footprint and a finger-painted Valentine heart. Can’t wait to see what kind of treat Mother’s Day brings! Now that I am a grandmother, I get to start saving treasures from the next generation, too.

Kids keepsakes for mom - footprint reindeer from child

Moms, I hope you treasure each keepsake from your kids and every happy memory from the years that fly by too fast!

And as my daughter Katie would remind you, “Relax and enjoy today.”

Happy Mother’s Day!

All My Best,

Kathy

A family photo of Kathy Davis and her family.

For 28 years, Kathy Davis has been the trusted voice of heartfelt connection. We can always count on her for the right words to offer comfort, share joy and celebrate life’s moments, big and small, which is why she continues to be a great friend and content partner.

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Filed Under: Uncategorized

Honoring another side of Mother’s Day

May 4 By American Greetings

Bereaved Mother's Day - May 8th - clasped hands offering support

How do we celebrate Mother’s Day? Brunches with fresh fruit and quiche and tulip centerpieces. Flowerpots overflowing with begonias to be planted. Ceramic handprint trinkets made for Mama. Cute little photos of cute little faces placed carefully in the center of heart-shaped paintings, kept in a folder to look at years later when the kids are all grown up.

Yet, there’s another side to Mother’s Day that we often overlook: the many women who are unable to have children and those mothers who have lost their children, always much too soon — sometimes before they get to see a first smile or hear a first laugh, other times after they’ve memorized every hair and freckle — but always much too soon.

Diana Stone is the Editor-In-Chief at Still Standing Magazine, an online magazine that focuses on “giving a voice to grief, connecting hearts around the world who have similar life experiences” and “becoming a resource for friends, family and medical professionals, to know how to support someone enduring child loss and/or infertility.”

Diana is an amazingly strong mother. She has two daughters, ages 8 and 2. She also has three sons, Preston, Julian and Kaden, who all passed away after they were born in 2012 and 2013.

She remembers being a little girl in church on Mother’s Day and watching as women stood to receive a flower for each child they had.

“As a girl, I had no idea the pain this must have caused some of the women sitting or who stood only to receive the number of flowers of their living children,” says Diana.

In 2010, people around the world began to recognize these women with their own special day. Bereaved Mother’s Day  takes place each year on the Sunday before traditional Mother’s Day. On this day, we honor the women who have experienced the heartbreak of losing a child, or infertility – and who may be experiencing Mother’s Day grief.

But while society has made a lot of progress with recognition of bereaved parents, many people still don’t know how to handle others’ grief. It can feel uncomfortable, and there’s a sense of uncertainty about what to say or do for those who are grieving. Unfortunately, that uncertainty often leads to silence or avoidance where there could be compassion and empathy.

“Bereaved Mother’s Day holds a special place in many of our hearts because it is a day set aside to honor many women who may have never been publicly called ‘Mother,’ who always see child(ren) missing as their others play, and who feel someone is gone in a packed room when no one else may even know,” says Diana. “As a mother with only two of my five children living, it’s always been an important day for me because it gives me a reason to share about my other children. I know we shouldn’t ‘need’ a reason, but many of us do. We aren’t able to post updates or share their funny stories, so this is one day set aside for the memories we so very much wish we could still be making with them.”

People who are aware of Bereaved Mother’s Day might not know what to say or how they can show up for their loved ones who experience this day.

How can we show them that we care? How can we recognize their loss and acknowledge what they are going through in a sensitive and meaningful way?

What we say and do matters most in our relationships with women who experience this day. The best thing you can do for them is to show them how much you care by communicating it to them.

“First, if someone is reading this and [thinks], ‘Yes — how do I show this support?’ Thank you. Thank you for wanting to show us you care, because that means so much,” says Diana.

She says it can be as simple as saying, ”I don’t know exactly what to say, but I do want you to know I remember and am thinking of you, especially today.” She stresses that if their child had a name, you should use it.

How else can we show support during this time of intense emotion? You could call them, ask if they would like to talk about it over tea. Send flowers or a card to simply say you’re thinking of them. Offer your time and company.

Bereaved Mother's Day - offering support over a cup of tea

“If you are able to do something, please don’t say, ‘Let me know if I can do something’ — just do it,” says Diana. “Let them know you’ll be dropping off dessert, send them a memory necklace, write them a letter.”

Diana encourages bereaved parents to connect with others who are going through the same thing, so they can also find encouragement and support from those who know what that feels like.

“If you have lost a child, know there are thousands of us out there who know each and every emotion you are walking through,” she says. “Reach out to a community online or in person for support and help. We wish we weren’t part of this, but since we are, most of us just want to make sure no one else ever walks this alone.”

Diana suggests that those who haven’t experienced the loss of a child take this opportunity on Bereaved Mother’s Day to learn how to support those who have. Mamas need to know that friends, family and especially other mamas have their backs — especially when the absolute worst thing possible happens and a child’s life is lost. In those most painful times, and in the lifetime ahead, it means everything for a loving and compassionate community to show up in support of the grieving.

Even if you’re not getting along or you’ve lost touch, try to show up anyway. Imagine how much it could mean to someone to know that even though you don’t talk much anymore, you are thinking of them and their struggle.

“It can be a conversation starter and a healing place with a rocky relationship,” Diana says. “You may be the only person who has asked about their child or said their child’s name in a very long time.”

We all know it’s important to keep our relationships close. And it can mean so much to someone when we express our thoughtful support for them.

“Mother’s Day is a beautiful day and a very hard day all wrapped into one, and I think Bereaved Mother’s Day gently honors the intent while asking our society to simply consider another truth in many lives,” Diana says. “It’s a reminder that a mother may look completely different from someone you see with her hands full of little ones or the grandmother surrounded by grandchildren.“

Remember, honoring someone can be a simple as being brave enough to have a difficult conversation, and showing up for them is any way you can, no matter what. At the end of the day, being there for the people who matter most means everything.

You may even choose to write what you feel down in a simple note they may choose to keep and read whenever they need support. For some ways you can get started, we have invited writers who have talked with so many who have experienced grief and loss to share their insights here.

Read on to see more hearts connecting and helpful insights about the other, less visible sides of Mother’s Day.

See Diana’s story on Still Standing Magazine’s website to learn more about her.

A portrait of Diana Stone, Editor-in-Chief of Standing Still, Bereaved Mother's Day - May 8

Diana Stone is the Editor-in-Chief of Still Standing. We’re so grateful she has shared her story and mission with us.

 

Bereaved Mother's Day - May 8 - pink roses on a gray hardwood backdrop

 

Article written by Sophie Franchi. Sophie is a mother, a writer, an editor and a thinker. In 2016, she graduated from The University of Akron, where she earned a BA in English with a minor in Creative Writing. She’s also a bartender at HiHO Brewing Company, where she first developed a love for IPAs. She is the former Managing Editor of The Devil Strip, the alt-monthly arts and culture magazine based Akron, Ohio. She loves Akron with a whole lot of her heart.

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Filed Under: Mother's Day, Relationship Expertise Tagged With: bereaved mother's day, mother's day and infertility, mother's day grief, mother's day sympathy, relationship expertise

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