How Cats Celebrate Birthdays 1. Rise at first light. Sit on owners face until they wake up. 2. Loudly demand birthday breakfast be served. 3. Shun two kinds of cat food. Shun owner, then grudgingly eat organic tuna. 4. Visit magic box. Find conditions unacceptable. 5. Enjoy private time behind sofa. 6. Enjoy watching owner clean magic box and area behind sofa. 7. Practice the ol yoga stretches. 8. Hork hairball into secret hiding place. 9. Stare at wall. Pretend to see something owner cannot. 10. Sleep for 18 hours. Start all over again. Hope your birthday is just as much fun!
Some Sons (A Birthday poem just for you) Some sons are polite and sweet. Some have nasty-smelling feet. Some join bands and play the drums. Others exercise their thumbs . . . Some do well in every class. Some delight in passing gas. Some are rude and awfully loud . . . And some sure make their family proud! (You're definitely one of those!) Happy Birthday, Son.