How I tried to remember your birthday! I wrote the date upon my hand and also in a planner. I hired a plane to jog my brain by pulling a great big banner. I taped your picture on the fridge so thoughts of you would linger. And finally, I found some string . . . and tied it to my finger. But I must've tied it too tight, 'cause I cut off my circulation, passed out, and didn't come to until your birthday was over. Happy Belated!
Top 5 Excuses for Missing Your Birthday 5. The string I tied around my finger (so I wouldn't forget) came off in the shower. 4. The video of my cat playing the piano went viral, and I thought I was too good for my old acquaintances. 3. I was taking flying lessons. WEEEEE. 2. I was putting on a puppet show for neighborhood kids, and they insisted on several encores. And the number one reason: I'm the worst. Anyway, Happy Birthday!